Living Lucky® Podcast with Jason and Jana Banana

When Kids' Imaginations Go Dark

• Jana and Jason Shelfer • Season 8 • Episode 85

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When Kids' Imaginations Go Dark: How Your Stories (and Attention) Create Your Reality (Living Lucky® Podcast)

What happens when a lighthearted interview with a 4-year-old takes a startling turn into an elaborate kidnapping tale? On this profound Living Lucky® Podcast episode, Jason and Jana Banana reveal how this unexpected moment exposes a universal truth: the stories we tell ourselves (and others) are incredibly powerful, actively creating our reality!

Discover how we often confuse attention with love and acceptance, unconsciously clinging to disempowering narratives (even victimhood) because they generate the validation we crave. What you give your mindset and attention to, you ultimately live into. Learn how our subconscious mind and Reticular Activating System (RAS) then seek evidence to confirm these chosen narratives—whether they empower you or reinforce limiting beliefs.

This episode is a vital self-help guide for personal development. You'll gain crucial insights into filtering the information you allow into your brain and consciously choosing empowering narratives that align with your dreams and goals.

Ready to transform your life by transforming your story? Break free from disempowering tales and take control of your narrative. Tune in to Living Lucky® and unlock the true power of self-awareness and positive thinking to create the abundant life you crave!

  • How stories shape our reality.
  • The power of attention in personal growth.
  • Overcoming limiting beliefs through storytelling.
  • How the subconscious mind creates reality.
  • Cultivating a positive mindset with narratives.
  • Self-help for changing personal stories.
  • The link between imagination and reality.
  • Why we seek attention with negative stories.
  • How to filter information for mental well-being. Life coaching for narrative change. "How do the stories we tell ourselves affect our lives?" "What is the Reticular Activating System (RAS)?" "How does attention influence reality?" "Can changing your narrative change your life?" "What is the difference between attention and love?" "How to develop self-awareness through personal stories?" "Why do people cling to victimhood narratives?"

Stories, Reality, Attention, Mindset, Positive Thinking, Self-Awareness, Narrative, Subconscious, Imagination, Validati

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The 4 pillars of Living Lucky
Believe in yourself
Believe in the people around you
Believe in your circumstances and
Believe that God is working through you, for you, and always conspiring in your favor.

*Previously Recorded

Jana Shelfer:

Are you ready to create a life you crave? Let's spin that doom loop of negativity into an upward success cycle and start Living Lucky®. Good morning. I'm Jana, I'm Jason and we are Living Lucky® you are too.

Jana Shelfer:

We are in my childhood town and we're here with my family. We are in my childhood town and we're here with my family. So I thought, wouldn't it be such a treat to interview my four-year-old niece for this podcast? So I sat Evan down yesterday and I just started asking her about her Getting life from a four-year-old perspective.

Jason Shelfer:

It sounds like it could be so cool. I did, because you know I Kids say the darndest things.

Jana Shelfer:

Right, Isn't that how it goes? And I thought you know what. I just want to share her laughter and her light and her innocent perspective on life and her energy. Yeah, I know she's great. So I sit her down and all of a sudden she starts telling me that she was kidnapped seven weeks ago and that she had to punch the kidnapper in the face and all of a sudden I'm like this is not like this went dark, quick this is not taking the path that I thought it was going to.

Jana Shelfer:

So then I showed the podcast to her parents and her mom got very, very concerned, a little distraught, because where did this imagination come from?

Jason Shelfer:

Like we know, four-year-olds have a great imagination, yes, but when we articulate that into a story that's being told to someone else, it can be scary.

Jana Shelfer:

Now, the reason that I bring this up is because we all do this to some extent. So she is four years old and, yes, she has an imagination. And somehow it went dark, I'm not sure where she was exposed to the story of being kidnapped, and I mean literally. She gave me details like he tried to put her in a trash can.

Jana Shelfer:

Yeah, he showed up in a truck with a mask on and I started being very, very aware of the questions I was asking, because I didn't want to create a false memory yes, and I didn't want to give it too much attention, and which is why we're not airing that podcast right but I also you know, I've talked to you about it, jason and we all do this we all start telling stories and sometimes our imagination does kick in a little bit, and sometimes it can go for the better and sometimes it can maybe go a little macabre yeah, like it could have been.

Jason Shelfer:

Someone delivered rainbows and unicorns.

Jana Shelfer:

And I would have been all over that Right, right.

Jason Shelfer:

That's the story that you kind of want to dig into and get curious about. Not saying did not get curious about a kidnapping, but obviously when we know the parents and we know that her input is closely guarded.

Jana Shelfer:

So here's another element to all of this is what you give attention to is what we all kind of live into.

Jason Shelfer:

Yes.

Jana Shelfer:

So I really needed to be very careful because when I got this podcast done, I went out and I was like you got to hear this and of course I'm sharing it with the adults and I quickly realized you know what she's taking all of this in. And I need to be careful, what we give attention to, because those are the stories we live into. We all create stories. We all create stories and we all live into our own reality.

Jason Shelfer:

Yes, and a lot of times, when we tell ourselves stories all day long. What is the story that we're telling ourselves? Does it lean towards our goals and dreams, or does it lean towards our fears and doubts?

Jana Shelfer:

And many times when we get attention, whether or not the story is empowering, we tend to live into.

Jason Shelfer:

Live towards the attention.

Jana Shelfer:

Where we get attention, whether it's from the people around us, whether it's from the universe, whether it.

Jason Shelfer:

I mean she became a drama queen quickly, yeah, and she gets attention for that Right consistently play the victim, or when you consistently say things don't work out for me because someone will come in, fill that space and coddle you for that, and you're like, oh, this is what I'm really lacking underneath, is that attention and this is what I'm craving. So that's how I'm going to start interacting with people socially.

Jana Shelfer:

Yes, and there's such a blurry line here, because we always want to believe people's stories. We need to believe people when they tell us things and at the same time, we need to put a microscope on ourselves and believe. Almost evaluate is my story really true?

Jason Shelfer:

Is this true the person? Or, instead of living into this emotion of I'm a victim, I have doubts, I have fears, we can change the conversation to what are your dreams and what are your goals, just so that we can kind of get out of that instead of feeding the emotion and feeding the attention. Because so too many times we laugh at someone else's dream, yes, too many times we tell someone oh, you can't, because you're too young, because you're too old, because you're too fat, because you're too skinny, because you're too, all these things. And if we start believing more in the possibilities of good and what can be achieved, then we can start creating a new attention area to focus on. But when we can quickly jump to oh, it's okay, oh, poor you, oh, I'm so sorry this happened, that creates a new attention.

Jana Shelfer:

So as the adult in this. Almost like a negative gift for someone as the adult in this equation, I really I guess I all of a sudden became aware of the responsibility in raising these kids, because what you laugh out and what you react to or just as a listener.

Jason Shelfer:

It doesn't even have to be with kids. It could just be with Our friends, your friends, your siblings, your neighbors, the person in the grocery line, because we're all seeking some form of validation, some form of just attention. I think that attention is the word of the day.

Jana Shelfer:

Because we mix attention with love. Yes, I really think we're all just wanting to be loved and accepted.

Jason Shelfer:

We want to be seen, heard and accepted.

Jana Shelfer:

Yes, and so sometimes, when people give us attention, even if it's, you know, in the, in the media world or in the entertainment world, we had a saying no publicity is bad publicity. As long as they're talking about us, yeah, as long as they're talking about us, it's all good and it's kind of like that in life too right.

Jason Shelfer:

So how do I create them talking? Well, you see it in the news every day. How do I create them talking about me or us, yes, and as soon as I get that, I start building that avalanche and I'm like OK, I need to add to that, I need to keep adding and keep growing in this area because, this creates more of what I'm looking for.

Jana Shelfer:

Oh my gosh.

Jason Shelfer:

It was such an eye opener for me.

Jana Shelfer:

And, as the interviewer, I was sitting there and she was telling me details and again, I was trying to be very you know, it's like she's watching a Lifetime movie. I've watched a ton of crime, shows Lifetime and.

Jana Shelfer:

Dateline, and you know so. Jason, who has a law enforcement background, has often said to me OK, you have to really be careful of the questions you ask, because they can be leading, and I know this from journalism too. You don't want to ask leading questions, or do you? Depending on what outcome you want. So I was really trying to ask open-ended questions and just repeat what she said to me in the words that I use. However, it was really daunting.

Jason Shelfer:

Yeah, and I love that you come back to that question. Or just the statement tell me more yeah, because that doesn't lead anywhere. It just says, okay, well, what else? But you could see that she was growing this narrative. She was it wasn't something that she was remembering. She was growing it.

Jana Shelfer:

And the fact that we were talking in a microphone and in my podcast equipment it almost, and she's a natural performer.

Jason Shelfer:

So, like she. She craves performance, or she craves, I guess, having an audience is what it is. Oh, my gosh so having the microphone, thinking that this is going to be aired and all that she's like. I'm going to give them the show of a lifetime.

Jana Shelfer:

I realized you know the power of a four-year-old, I was like wow. And then also I started thinking last night about we really have to be careful what information comes into our brains, because whether or not we realize it, maybe somewhere in our subconscious mind we are you know, does art create reality or does reality create art? You've heard that.

Jason Shelfer:

Well, that's so big because who, how many four-year-olds know, even know the word kidnapping?

Jana Shelfer:

I know and then the fact she was like it was seven weeks ago and it was a masked man like.

Jason Shelfer:

I'm surprised she didn't use word like intruder, but if we so if we perpetrator, we don't have the words, yeah, we don't use them in the story.

Jana Shelfer:

Yes, so she's heard that somewhere.

Jason Shelfer:

Yes, and that's the kind of interesting thing is okay. Well, what words are we creating our individual language out of every single day? Because they're going to show up more and more in our stories.

Jana Shelfer:

And she at four years old you're like a sponge. However, we all are sponges. Yeah, we all are sponges, even at 50 years old. When I am hearing and seeing things, I really need to filter what it is that I want to capture. I mean, thoughts are just thoughts. It's the ones that we lasso and hold on to and say this is my story.

Jason Shelfer:

Yeah, because we'll hear something or watch something on the news or on television and then our subconscious mind and our inner voice will start creating a dialogue in there, like, well, what if this, what if that? And it's creating the intention on your reticular activating system, really, so that you are constantly giving yourself belief, hope, dreams and a pathway towards that.

Jana Shelfer:

Oh my gosh. Lots to think about here. However, you will not be hearing my four-year-old niece.

Jason Shelfer:

Not yet. We're going to give her a couple more years yes, and we might need to uh help filter just kind of explore it a little bit more, get curious well, thanks for joining us.

Jana Shelfer:

I hope this, I hope this maybe uh gets you thinking a little differently gives you a little insight and I hope it was a little fun and maybe even start bringing awareness to what we allow into our own reality.

Jason Shelfer:

Yeah, and if you have a four-year-old, send a. And they've said some crazy stuff to you. Send us a text through the show notes here and let us know what they've told you.

Jana Shelfer:

Have a great day.

Jason Shelfer:

Keep Living Lucky®.

Jana Shelfer:

Bye-bye. If the idea of Living Lucky® appeals to you, visit us at www. LivingLucky. com.

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Jana Shelfer

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Jason Shelfer

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