Living Lucky® Podcast with Jason and Jana Banana

The Paradox of Potential

• Jana and Jason Shelfer • Season 7 • Episode 15

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Feeling Stuck in the "Potential" Paradox? This Episode Can Help You Break Free

Have you ever felt like you're constantly chasing an elusive "potential" that diminishes your present achievements? You're not alone! In this episode of Living Lucky®, Jana and Jason unpack the surprising downsides of the "potential" concept and how it can sabotage your self-worth.

Here's what you'll discover:

  • The Shadow Side of Potential: Learn how the constant focus on "potential" can make you feel like you're never good enough, overshadowing your current efforts and successes.
  • The Power of Words: Explore the impact of language on motivation and self-perception. Discover how to choose empowering words that uplift yourself and others.
  • Shifting Your Perspective: This episode will guide you in understanding and respecting your unique journey.You'll learn how to create a reality aligned with your values, not external expectations.
  • Introducing "Living Lucky®": Ditch the pressure of potential and embrace the liberating concept of "living lucky®." This episode will show you how to seize opportunities, define success on your terms, and break free from societal constraints.

Ready to ditch the struggle and start living lucky?

Key Takeaways:

  • Potential can be a double-edged sword. While it motivates growth, it can also make you undervalue your present accomplishments.
  • Be mindful of the words you choose. Empowering language fuels self-worth and motivates others.
  • Focus on your journey, not some hypothetical future self. Celebrate your progress and embrace the possibilities that lie ahead.
  • Living Lucky® is about living on your terms. Define success for yourself and seize the abundance of life with enthusiasm.

Join Jana and Jason and discover the power of living lucky! This episode is your guide to shedding limiting beliefs and creating a life filled with purpose and joy.

P.S. Don't forget to visit us at www.livinglucky.com [invalid URL removed] for more inspiration and to join our community of like-minded individuals on their journey to abundance and fulfillment.

#LivingLucky #BreakFreeFromPotential #SelfWorth #EmpoweringMindset
Living Lucky, self-worth, limiting beliefs, potential paradox, empowering language, reframe your perspective, "living lucky" mindset, break free from limit

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The 4 pillars of Living Lucky
Believe in yourself
Believe in the people around you
Believe in your circumstances and
Believe that God is working through you, for you, and always conspiring in your favor.

*Previously Recorded

Jana Shelfer:

Are you ready to create a life you crave? Let's spin that doom loop of negativity into an upward success cycle and start Living Lucky®.

Jason Shelfer:

Good morning.

Jana Shelfer:

I'm Jana Shelfer and this is my husband, Jason Shelfer, and we are Living Lucky®. You are too! . . . Potential.

Jason Shelfer:

Oh, potential there's that word.

Jana Shelfer:

Potential is what's out in front. I always perceived that potential was a good thing when you would say oh, you know what I see potential in you, kid, I've got such potential I've got such potential. I'm not good enough, like I am oh, that's an inner thought, though that's's a limiting belief.

Jason Shelfer:

It is.

Jana Shelfer:

However, I realized today that people sometimes perceive it like that, including myself.

Jason Shelfer:

Sometimes that is what we hear behind the curtain.

Jana Shelfer:

Including myself. Sometimes I hear it like that.

Jason Shelfer:

We don't listen to it because we see the benefit of potential and it's beautiful. It gives us something to move towards.

Jana Shelfer:

Cause I often have felt, you know, like when people say, oh my gosh, Jana, if only you saw in yourself what I see in you, like so many people say that to me.

Jason Shelfer:

And then I think I, I have an awesome life Like what, what, what I do do see it, but you don't see it all like I see so much, like I see how amazing and powerful and wonderful you are wait, but aren't I being that right now?

Jana Shelfer:

you are, but there's like there's you're saying but, you're saying but and there's so much more, because there's a lot that I don't claim.

Jason Shelfer:

Like. I think if I and this is what people do, and this is how people do it I would be wearing that gold medal all the time, and this is the thing. I don't have the gold medal, so I can say that.

Jana Shelfer:

Yeah.

Jason Shelfer:

I had gone and done all the work and been in the Paralympics for 12 years, gotten a bronze medal, gone in Atlanta, gone to Australia, come in fourth or fifth, then gone to Greece and got a gold medal and came home and I was just like 10 feet tall and bulletproof. I'd be like I'm walking around all the state of Florida wearing this gold medal on my chest, just showing it off, walking into every business, going you're darn right, I'm Team USA gold medalist and that's not the case Like Olympic athletes. Just don't do that, Because I'm not an Olympic athlete.

Jana Shelfer:

I don't know about all that. I'm not sure that's what we're talking about here, though that's more. That's a case of humility, Right.

Jason Shelfer:

Well, it's also in pride and all these things. But I think that's what people see, I'd say when they say I see all this greatness in you and when we see that we can also see the potential in what's going to go forward so jason and I were watching this really thought-provoking movie that's a good way to put it is that's the best way to describe this movie and one of the quotes in there.

Jana Shelfer:

They were talking about potential and the main character says I see so much potential in my people. That's what he said. And the person across the table says oh, that's just another way of saying what's in front of you isn't good enough, and that whole exchange.

Jason Shelfer:

That was a pause in the movie moment.

Jana Shelfer:

It was. I said stop the movie. We've got to analyze this because watching it happen Stop the projector. Sometimes we just need that, Like sometimes I wish my movie, I could watch it play out and pause it and say oh my gosh, I want to like zoom out and analyze because and be objective about it. Yes and be objective.

Jason Shelfer:

Instead of being the subject of it.

Jana Shelfer:

When I saw that whole exchange happen. It just made sense, because sometimes, when you know I've been in conversations with people when they're feeling down and out and they're, you know, they're kind of in a woe is me moment and I feel like I'm doing them a favor by saying I believe in you, you can do this. And you know you know I'm, I'm.

Jana Shelfer:

My intention is to fill them with confidence reassurance belief motivation, inspiration, seeing you, what I see in you, and and then when you see it from the other side, you think, oh my gosh, maybe if they're really that down and out, what they're really hearing is I'm not good enough the way I am.

Jason Shelfer:

And I'm working so hard just to be here.

Jana Shelfer:

I am barely surviving. I am barely keeping my head above water and you're saying you see all this potential in me.

Jason Shelfer:

What you're not seeing is Everything it takes to get to the starting line.

Jana Shelfer:

Yes, and what's so crazy is in that moment I really reflected myself in both characters. Yeah, I saw myself in both characters. I'm like I've been that person and I've been that person.

Jason Shelfer:

To myself and to other people Wait.

Jana Shelfer:

I am both of these characters all at once sometimes.

Jason Shelfer:

And I think that's where it comes in to say you know what? We just need to understand that everyone has their own story, Everyone has their own reality and we can all just pay attention to the words that we're using, recognize that, yeah, we do have capacity to take advantage of or take agency of our life.

Jana Shelfer:

Oh, that's better. Yes.

Jason Shelfer:

And like we now recognize that we get to create our own reality and that comes down to it's taken us a while to get here it has reality and that comes down to. It's taken us a while to get it has and it's.

Jana Shelfer:

And I will say we still catch ourselves every now and then saying things where we have to keep each other, where we choose to keep each other accountable, and we say, wait, we need to watch our words because we're gonna fall back in.

Jason Shelfer:

I mean it's we spent 40 years learning the other ways and it's been the last 10 years where we're kind of learning this new vernacular, learning a new way, learning how things can be. And how to filter how we've been told things are, because really life is full of possibilities and opportunities and this abundance of just everything is available and possible.

Jana Shelfer:

When I was watching that scene. I actually thought of myself, and that's where I'm going with. Possibilities is a little more of freedom of choice, yeah, whereas potential puts a little pressure. Maybe the word potential has a little more of a weighty. It can feel a little like I'm not living up to my potential, I'm not doing my part. Well, if you look at it, I mean and I hate.

Jason Shelfer:

I don't want to be the devil's advocate, because we do lift each other up, but there's potential for a downside right.

Jason Shelfer:

Oh God I don't even know what conversation am I in right now, so, but the thing is so, yeah, but it's, it is the possibility, it's the what is. What do you want to choose? Do you want to choose like, and are we choosing what lifts us up? Are we choosing what brings us down? And that's where, a lot of times, like, I find myself like not receiving all the benefits of the things that lift me up.

Jana Shelfer:

You know, one tool that we learned in our hypnosis training is to put ourselves in other people's shoes. So when we are having conversations, to really try to put ourselves in the perspective or in the shoes of the person we're speaking with, or the person that we're speaking, that we're hearing from, or the person that we're speaking to, and that way we can kind of understand where are they coming from, where are they?

Jason Shelfer:

Yeah, how can I understand? How can I?

Jana Shelfer:

Yes, and how have they formulated their viewpoint of the world?

Jason Shelfer:

Yeah, and when I can start building that understanding of that viewpoint and I can see I can start maybe understanding that vision, then I can, when I understand that, then I can start crafting my questions and crafting the things that I'm hoping to articulate in a more fluid and conversational, um communicative way, build that bridge.

Jana Shelfer:

Yes, because I can see now where, in so many ways, saying you know, I see so much potential in in you and your career, or in you and your relationship and you and your whatever you're doing, yeah, if you it can really feel like you know what. It doesn't matter what I do, it's never going to be good enough.

Jason Shelfer:

Yeah, think, when you just mentioned that, about how many times people say I see so much potential in your relationship, uh-huh. If you think about that and you dissect that, how many people actually know what's really happening in someone else's relationship I mean, it's typically your neighbors or people's neighbors are the biggest surprised people when someone gets divorced.

Jason Shelfer:

Yeah, that's true, family members are surprised when someone gets divorced. But people often say I see so much potential in your relationship, like, like there's weird things, right, but they have no idea. But when you talk about the whole thing, about if you can understand their viewpoint, like how they, what their perspective of the world is, and that's really getting them to uncover and be authentic and vulnerable, like, like, really be real with you, then we can start crafting that new vernacular, the new way of doing things, the way of being, so that there there is, there are possibilities in there.

Jana Shelfer:

Yes.

Jason Shelfer:

So that there there can be a new life, or new whatever they want, or there doesn't have to be, or there doesn't have to be. It can be whatever they want it to be, but they get to start creating the reality that they want. They get to choose yes.

Jana Shelfer:

They get to choose, and I think that's really part of it is just realizing that if they do feel there are limitations, that is just an illusion. Oh, that's so big yes, oh my god, are we there? Yes, okay, the illusion oh, the possibilities, the possibilities get rid of the illusion keep living lucky. Get rid of the potential dump, that word. Not that I'm telling you what to do. All right, thanks for joining us.

Jason Shelfer:

Keep Living Lucky®.

Jana Shelfer:

Bye-bye. If the idea of Living Lucky appeals to you, visit us at www. livinglucky. com.