Feeling Stuck? Uncover the Secret Weapon That Could Transform Your Life (and Your Relationship)
Life throws us curveballs. Sometimes, we get stuck carrying the weight of past choices, even holding ourselves back from truly connecting with the people we love. But what if there was a way to break free and unlock a new level of growth and happiness?
In this episode of the Living Lucky® Podcast, we (Jason & Jana) dive deep into the transformative power of radical gratitude. We share a powerful personal story about how a simple shift in perspective during a virtual church service completely transformed our understanding of forgiveness.
Here's what you'll discover:
Why self-forgiveness might not be the key: We explore the concept of radical gratitude as an alternative to self-forgiveness, helping you reframe past experiences as stepping stones for growth.
The unexpected spark that ignited a journey: We reveal the pivotal moment during a church service where Pastor Scott Chevalier's question about forgiveness led us down a path of radical self-acceptance.
Embracing the "extra" in you: Learn to appreciate the unique layers of experiences and challenges that make you, you. These are not burdens, but opportunities for growth.
The power of "for us," not "to us": Shift your perspective and see how life's challenges can actually be working in your favor, propelling you towards a brighter future.
Creating the life you crave: We'll equip you with the tools to take control of your reactions and consciously design the reality you desire.
This episode is a powerful call to action for anyone seeking to:
Heal from past hurts and regrets
Deepen connections with loved ones
Break free from self-doubt and limitations
Embrace a growth mindset
Live a life filled with gratitude and joy
Ready to stop feeling stuck and start living lucky? Tune in and discover the power of radical gratitude!
Self-forgiveness, Radical Gratitude, Personal Growth, Relationships, Forgiveness, Mindset, Gratitude, Healing, Happiness, Self-compassion, how to practice radical gratitude, letting go of past regrets, forgiveness in relationships, changing your perspective on life challenges, Jason & Jana, Living Lucky community
!!! SEND US A MESSAGE: Are you ready to unlock your path to a more inspired life where you're Living Lucky®? Email me directly and let's chart your course toward realizing your dreams and creating a life that fills you with daily inspiration. Email Jason Shelfer HERE
The 4 pillars of Living Lucky Believe in yourself Believe in the people around you Believe in your circumstances and Believe that God is working through you, for you, and always conspiring in your favor.
*Previously Recorded
Jana Shelfer:
Are you ready to create a life you crave? Let's spin that doom loop of negativity into an upward success cycle and start Living Lucky®.
Jason Shelfer:
Good morning, I'm Jana and we are Living Lucky® you are too because you are listening to the Living Lucky® Podcast with Jason
Jana Shelfer:
It sounds like we've practiced that but we have it. We've just done it enough times. Now. We're talking about passionate compassion, passionate forgiveness, forgiveness, passionate forgiveness. That would be kind of a fun thing.
Jason Shelfer:
Let's practice some of that. Back it up. Shopper. I won't go there this morning because I need some passionate forgiveness.
Jana Shelfer:
Okay, jason and I, we often surround ourselves with cohorts, other coaches, colleagues, people who are mind leaders, people who are in the realm of self-development, and the topic of compassionate forgiveness has been one that has caused a little spark for Jason and I, and here's why because when okay. So according to some others, some other philosophies, compassionate forgiveness is a step in the transcending experience or the self-development world there's always a self-forgiving component.
Jason Shelfer:
Yeah, and it's, and it seems to be a really big one. And I really operate from the standpoint of we're all doing the best we can with what we have at the time and it's like, from the mental capacity that I've got, the emotional capacity that I've got and the physical capacity I've got, the spiritual capacity I've got, I'm showing up the best I can in that moment. So it's a it's. It's one of those things where it's like I don't feel like I should beat my younger self up, so yesterday's self up for something that I gained awareness of today, you know now that we're thinking about it okay, so I get forgiveness isn't beating yourself up.
Jana Shelfer:
I do remember a specific day where I had an aha moment of forgiving myself and I don't. I'll refresh your memory and see if you remember it as well. We were right in the middle of the. Actually, the pandemic had just started and Jason and I had started volunteering, greeting for our church online Do you remember this? And the topic that day was forgiveness, and I remember Scott Chevalier even said afterwards, maybe in the chat he says this in the chat and Jason and I are monitoring the chat online For thousands of people, for thousands and thousands of people.
Jana Shelfer:
and I remember Scott Chevalier says is there anyone you need to forgive, maybe even yourself? And I remember having this almost burst out of tears, do you remember that? And I actually called Scott after we had closed the chat out and church was over. I called Scott and he was one of the pastors at the time and I remember having a conversation with him saying I didn't even know I needed to forgive myself and I went into things that I mean were really, really old we're talking 30 years old. But I remember the one thing I said to him as I forgive myself for getting into the car, I was in a car accident at age 15 and I remember saying I forgive myself for getting into that car and I didn't know there was gonna be an accident. You know what I'm saying, but for some reason I had held some sort of responsibility so there was a block inside of.
Jana Shelfer:
if I had not gotten into that car Then I wouldn't be paralyzed right now and I wouldn't have caused so much pain and suffering for my family and my community and my town. And and even today, you know, it feels like every time we get into the car you have to put my chair in the Back of the truck and it feels like I've caused us a lot of extra. Whenever we go anywhere, is there's extra in realizing is this accessible, is this? And I sometimes feel like I am A little bit of a burden to those that love and care for me we are, we are extra, that's, that's that's how God created us.
Jason Shelfer:
Were just extra my perception, because one of the other things is you are, you have the gratitude of Our relationship and that if you had not been in the relationship or in a wheelchair, would we have the type of bond we have I don't think so it's. It's because I never really thought about it because I never when I imagine myself as a kid Getting married, which I don't know that I really ever had that right there are times where I was like, yeah, I'm gonna find that that perfect woman and you never.
Jason Shelfer:
I never pictured her in my mind in a wheelchair.
Jana Shelfer:
Yeah, I know cuz you were picturing sandy from grease.
Jason Shelfer:
And then we met and hung out and I was like, and that point when we met, I said I never, I'm never gonna get married yeah, I know that was my whole mindset. Mindset was I'm so happy and content on my own. I am not gonna ever get married and we spent several weeks together and I was like I never want to be without this right and I get that too, okay.
Jana Shelfer:
So you just brought up a really important point that I am going to bridge this conversation. So some people call it compassionate forgiveness. I think jason and I took that forgiveness and we took it a step further and we actually reframed it in our minds To being grateful for it, because and here's why when you forgive yourself, there is an implication.
Jason Shelfer:
I call it a veil. It's like a veil of that you did something wrong or that there's yes, there's something, and it's probably comes from a religious type teaching that we picked up somewhere and it might not even deal with.
Jana Shelfer:
forgiveness may just mean letting go and and that's what I was gonna say is maybe you and I are putting a little bit of a connotation on what we're giving ourselves, or saying sorry for giving someone else it's like is it just letting go or is it?
Jason Shelfer:
Is it saying you did this to me, yeah, and I'm gonna not accept it like you tried to give it. I'm not accepting it anymore.
Jana Shelfer:
I'm not holding on to this anymore so let me let me just clarify and give you all the details of this conversation. Once the people that we're with have all insisted that self forgiveness is part of the self development process, jason and I, we stepped in and said we don't like to call it self forgiveness, we like to call it radical gratitude. I think we're talking about the same thing.
Jason Shelfer:
I think it is, and it's very much like you say often if we get into an argument or we get into some of the different perspectives, it comes down to the different side of the same coin.
Jana Shelfer:
And I think the reason that I call it radical gratitude is because I showed up the best that I could in my entire life. At every minute of every day I really have, I feel that, you know, there's times where I Would have liked to have been better and there's also times when I am so proud that I was as good as I was, if that makes sense. So it's a. Life is an up and down. We have come to that realization. Life is An up and down and we can't always control our outside circumstances, but we can control the way we react. And when I say, when I hear self forgiveness and I'm sorry to myself, it for me there is an implies that I Wasn't good enough and I never want to feel that way and the other part of that is is one of the things that we really heavily subscribe to is that life is always working in your favor.
Jana Shelfer:
Yes, all your life experience like here, I've got goosebumps because I firmly believe that everything that happens happens For us, and when we just that awareness even the things that we don't always choose or we, you know, would have liked to have Unfolded in a different way, it is always working in our favor.
Jason Shelfer:
makes us better. And this is one of those moments where you kind of walked up to the window. The shades are drawn and you peek out and now you see, so that you, you're having this awareness and this, this opening, so that you can see the difference. And when you see that difference, then you get to be grateful for that awareness, instead of Having compassionate forgiveness for who you were yesterday yes, what you did yesterday or how you responded yesterday or reacted yesterday. Now I get it. Depending on your definition of forgiveness, maybe it is forgiveness for you and that's okay. We.
Jason Shelfer:
I like to subscribe to Come this radical gratitude because to me that feels so much more exponentially forward.
Jana Shelfer:
It does for me to, and it feels like you're lifting your vibration. You're not only reframing it in your mind, but you are lifting your vibration and saying this is part of who I am and I'm proud of it, training your brain to look for the growth, not for the mistake.
Jason Shelfer:
Yes, and that, to me, is the distinction, distinction.
Jana Shelfer:
And that's what makes us great, jason, is because we did this. We did this.
Jason Shelfer:
In a. Well, you had a ten X on this three years ago. Three years and I guess, and that was after eight years of just kind of really diving into your life and saying what are the things that I previously thought happened to me that may have happened for me?
Jana Shelfer:
They happen for me, life is happening for me, and it is still occasionally get back and watch your ten X. If you haven't watched it yet, you really need to go on YouTube and watch it. And a shell for radical gratitude. Leave me a comment and I will reply.
Jason Shelfer:
Yes okay.
Jana Shelfer:
So I'm gonna stand by our Our philosophy that everything in our life happens for a reason and our challenges make us grow. They make us grow and we are creating our reality. Even the challenges in your life. You are creating those, and I mean there's many, many tools of how you can unfold and start consciously creating the life that you want. So if there is a change in your life, you can create it. You don't need to Compassionally forgive yourself. Let's be grateful that it is what it is and that we are aware of what's happening.
Jana Shelfer:
Amen all right, I'm gonna end it right there. Thank you so much for joining us. Please have a beautiful day, keep living lucky bye, bye.
Jana Shelfer:
If the idea of Living Lucky® appeals to you, visit us at www. Living Lucky. com.